Wednesday, September 07, 2005

I compute it to be an ionic directional probe searching for receiving outlets.

So, we did manage to win 6 out of the 7 games (TB + BAL series), as I randomly predicted. But the tea leaves aren't giving me much going into this week. I had a "feeling" about David's homer last night (I was in the car). So much so, that I made the prediction aloud more than once. I just knew Manny wasn't going to be clutch last night. Also, I think that David understood that it was him or extra innings and no one wanted Wake to squander his completed game. With luck, we will coast into the weekend and beat up on the Yankees. I don't want squeak-by wins. No. I want annihilation. Big time. I want to send them a stinging reminder as to just who the World Champions are. I want to take them down town.

Speaking of the Yankees, do you ever get the impression that Yankee-ville is like Stepford?

They take players - human beings - and drain them of their insides the minute they sign their contracts. The flesh and blood and various innards are quickly replaced with mechanical parts. They are then re-wired in ways that suit front office. Very few are lucky enough to escape and continue to enjoy fruitful major league careers (Carl Everett, for example, who doesn't believe in robots). Others escape temporarily, like Tino Martinez, but get pulled right back in. For the Tinos, it's like a Logan's Run type situation. Maybe George has some players equipped with a detonator. I wouldn't put it past the bastard. This theory can explain a lot, especially Bellhorn's new -and incredibly frightening - look. Perhaps Yankee-ville is like Hotel California. I knew that the pinstripes represented prison cell bars! I am going to work on a Free Bellhorn t-shirt right now!


At 2:59 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Excellent theory, my dear, and very well expressed!


At 4:48 PM, Anonymous Adam said...

It will be interesting to see whether Embree and Bellhorn, assuming they sign somewhere else next year, show any signs of having regained their souls--perhaps they won't have been with the Yankees long enough to have been fully assimilated.

At 12:22 PM, Anonymous PatG said...

I picture Embree and Bellhorn trying their best to blend in to that robot clubhouse, but you know they're constantly exchanging "this team is f*cked" glances in there. I feel bad for them, but they had their shot in Boston this year

At 3:38 PM, Anonymous peter* said...

There is a place where displaced and mindless ex-Yankees go to try to get on with life as we know it. It's a long road back.

At 11:12 AM, Blogger twitch124 said...

I'd buy that t-shirt.


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