Wednesday, September 21, 2005

Raymond's Destructive Ways

My NYC correspondent (okay, Jere) kindly sent me these images of Raymond going off on poor little stuffed Wally.

Here is the groin mascot holding little Wally and shaking him. It almost looks like he's using Wally like a mic, pointing it out into the crowd, Bon Jovi-style. You give mascots a bad name, Raymond!

In this picture, you see Raymond's large furry feet standing in back of wee Wally, lying still.

Mr. "I Don't Pick on Mascots My Own Size" is about the run over Wally with his remote control dune buggy thing.

Eek! Here's Wally getting hit.

Raymond inflicting more pain on an already hit Wally. This time with his enormous blue body.

Lastly, here's helpless Wally stuck under this cowardly bastard's wheels.

Also courtesy of Jere, here were Remy's quotes, while this all unfolded:

Raymond should be suspended for the remainder of the season. excuse....
That's assault and battery.
In all my time in baseball, I've never seen anything like that in my life.
Orsillo (after Rem says Wally got up, dusted himself off): Walter is very resilient.

I don't think there are words, really.


At 6:44 PM, Anonymous Andrew said...

I should point out that the order in which this unfolded was really more tightly plotted than just simple assault. First, Wally was run down by the ATV. Then big Raymond proceeded to fake CPR, including grotesquely exaggerated mouth-to-mouth, chest thumping, and finally mock-tearful resignation. Quite the atrocious pantomime.

At 7:07 AM, Anonymous peter* said...

It could only have been better if Wally was in the bullpen last night and came in to start the 8th inning. Better yet, we might have won if he had managed.

At 10:40 AM, Anonymous Joey The Greyhound said...

Don't look at Raymond with too much disdain. Clearly his behavior is indicative of someone who is beginning the process of applying for the Rays Manager job now that Lou Pinella won't be back....


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