Thursday, November 03, 2005

Slam Gram

I rarely blog about work. And I'm not stupid enough to do it in a negative way. In fact, my other blog is about my profession, and even in that one, I am careful not to mention anything incriminating.

That said, I'm going to take a moment to complain about one of my clients. He's a weasel of the worst kind. Recently, he lied to his teammates by publicly blaming me for one of his oversights. I am aware that he uses me for as the fall guy (girl), so I try not to take it personally. It is hard, though, because it's my job to ensure that our publishers are happy with our work and I represent my company, so I must be professional and helpful at all times. Privately, though, this guy really steams my clams. From my stewing, though, came an idea.

You know how there are companies who send "people grams"? Folks who dress up in silly costumes and spring a "happy birthday" or "congratulations" song and dance on the (supposedly) pleasantly surprised recipient? (Michael Jeter played one in The Fisher King - see image below). Well, imagine that you can call on a company to send the opposite type of message. Melodies like "Bite Me" and "Thanks for Being a Dick" and "Someone Wants You to Rot in Hell" could be part of the offering. I would most definitely send a "slam gram" to this jerk.

With my luck, a company like this already exists.


At 8:22 PM, Blogger Jere said...

I think this is a really great idea. You could have a special deal: "Know four assholes? Slam them all on one day with our new Grand Slam Gram!"

Also, the person receiving the slam would be handed the bill for the service at the end. Or it could be mailed to their home, so they receive it when they get home from work on the day they're slammed.

At 10:54 PM, Blogger 01245 said...

Oh! This is great! I love the Grand Slam Gram! I think the slammer (person who delivers the gram) should leave the recipient with a balloon shaped like a big ass. Just tie it to the edge of their cubicle, you know?

Getting the recipient to pay for their own gram is genius.


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